That Old Sweetheart from the Past

29.09.2011 | By: T. F.

What do you do when an old flame comes knocking on your door? Can the first “true” love shake or even destroy an existing marriage or relationship?

What happens when you meet the love of your youth? (PhotoXpress)

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Nancy Kalish, American psychologist believes: "If you are married and an old flame calls – do not pick up the phone!" Just so that you see that her statement is not just hot air, there was also a research made on 550 couples, who had not seen each other for a lot longer than five years.

The first love phenomenon

The research was carried out in America, where people often move from one country to another. So someone returning to the place where they were born for various reasons (mostly due to the death of one of the parents) happens quite often. Because they lost someone they cared for, they are emotionally vulnerable, so they think it would be nice to run into an old flame, just to see how s/he is doing. This is a double-edged sword because a casual encounter usually turns out into a very intense experience of reliving that love again. A great majority of the people involved in the research basically “knelt” before the first love phenomenon.

Can a partnership be ruined by an old flame?

Meeting a person we used to care for is not all that innocent as being in love in those days because it has, in most cases, negative consequences on an existing relationship or marriage.

Research shows that most people fall in love with their old flames again. They break up with the new partner or commit adultery. Some of the older people involved sometimes carried on parallel relationships for more than 30 years. As many as 60% of newly re-established relationships last and when the partners get married, the number of divorces is negligible, 3- 4%

So, will you pick up when an old flame calls and build the unfinished bridges of love? Will they make your life fuller, better...? If you think so, do not hesitate and call them yourself!