Have an Excellent First Date!

Follow these rules of communication and make sure you get the second date too!

 

Show interest for the person you're on a first date with. (Photoxpress)

 

On the first date we all want to develop a deeper relationship with the person we like. Many people forget to listen and place themselves in the center of attention. This can be a big step backwards in terms of communication and bonding, because many people get the feeling that what they're saying is not interesting enough.

To avoid any further communication problems, read the following advice.

1. Conversation on the first date should concern both of you

If someone shares his or her personal experience with you, for example traveling around the Caribbean, the worst option is to start talking about your own personal adventures. Instead of talking about yourself and what you experienced on your travels, you should rather focus on your date. Show the person you are genuinely interested in his or her adventures. Do not interrupt the speaker because the first step towards bonding is listening and commenting, but only at the most appropriate time.

2. Make use of what you hear on the first date

You can find many interesting things about the person during the conversation. The first date is actually an excellent opportunity to bond. It often happens that we don't listen carefully enough, overhear the most important things and talk about ourselves too much. Instead, you should grab every chance and connect everything you hear with your own adventures, feelings and opinions.

3. Be very attentive on the first date

Especially women like to pay a lot of attention to their looks and it goes unnoticed much too often. A simple compliment about her outfit (for example that her shoes match the purse really well) will make your date very happy. If you don't pay her a compliment she will most probably think that all her efforts were overlooked.

4. Empathy is very important on the first date

When you date explains about his or her own interests, hobbies and views about certain things, there are three ways in which you can react. The first is to simply agree with what was just said and respond with ''me too''. In this way you can show you have common interests. The second option is to disagree - but don't forget to tell what is the reason for your disagreement.  The third option and the most effective one is to show that you understand the feelings, interests and views of your date - even though they are not similar to yours. 

5. Talk about things that make you emotional

Find something that your date has special feelings about - it can be either friends, family, animals, traveling or sport. A good way to form a connection is to show some understanding. You should avoid using the words ''me too'' and just let the person talk. Do not forget to ask questions about all the things that you or your date feels passionate about.

If you use this simple advice, a conversation will last for hours and besides you will learn some very useful things just by listening - which can be very useful to you in the future.

Find more advice about dating in our Lover's Guide.

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