How to Re-Connect with Your Partner?

10.11.2011 | By: J. P.

We offer five tips that can help you bring back the passion in your relationship.

Don’t worry about your partner’s imperfections and try to concentrate on his virtues instead. (PhotoXpress)

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Your relationship can be full of love, understanding and passion if you put in just a little bit of effort. Don't know where to start? Why not try these simple but effective tips.

Listen

All experts agree that listening is the key element of a successful relationship. It can limit unnecessary conflicts, build up trust and strengthen partnership. It may sound simple, but true listening is a lot more than just sitting in the same room while your partner is talking. Show that you care, turn off the TV, look him or her into the eyes and show that you are really interested in what they have to say. This is especially important when your partner is upset. If you listen carefully, you’ll understand your partner’s frustration much better and you’ll be able to help more easily. You can learn how to listen. Begin by listening in other, less important situations, for example at work or while talking to your friends on the phone. It will help you to understand your partner better when they’re faced with more emotionally demanding issues.

Focus on good things

When we meet somebody new we pay attention mostly to the things we like about him or her. But after some time we take for granted all these positive traits and we begin to pay more attention to mistakes, which eventually start to annoy us. Such relationships become strained and often end in tears. The solution to this problem is to make a conscious decision that you won’t dwell on the imperfections but focus on his/her virtues instead. You can also make a list of things you like about your partner and you'll see they’re still the same person you fell in love with.

Don't nag

Nagging doesn’t do any good. It creates tension between the partners, leads to fights and never solves any problems. If you nag all the time your partner will just shut you out and ignore you. Try to express your dissatisfaction through rational dialog, present strong arguments and come up with solutions to the problem. Instead of repeating what you don't like rather tell your partner what you’d prefer. Offer an alternative and don't forget to balance critique with praise. Soften your every wish or demand, which your partner might perceive as nagging, with a compliment. Your partner will be motivated to please you and they will feel appreciated.

Spend time together

You have probably already heard this tip- have some time just for yourselves! But despite good intentions only a few couples manage to squeeze in some “we-time”. You should reserve a few days in your monthly schedule for spending some quality time together. In this way you will strengthen the sense of belonging and commitment. But you mustn’t limit yourselves only to preset dates. You should spend some time together ever day- at least in the morning, after work or before falling asleep. Every time one of you leaves or returns home, take time to say hello or goodbye. Your partner shouldn't be less important than the newspaper delivery guy.

Touch each other more often

Physical communication is important for nurturing your emotional as well as verbal connection. A gentle touch works miracles- it reduces stress and tension, eases pain, takes away sadness and shows your partner that you care. With hugs and caresses you can cement your friendship and with a kiss you show that the love you share hasn't died yet. Sleep in the same bed every night, even though you won’t make love every night. The very feeling of closeness is enough to warm our hearts.