How to Tell Him You Expected More from Sexual Intercourse?

When honestly criticising intercourse you have to choose the right words and be diplomatical. Read how to do it!

If you’re not happy with the intercourse, tell your partner in a cunning and diplomatic way. (JLP)

 

Avoid direct accusations

If one of the partners isn’t satisfied with relations, he/she shouldn’t keep it locked up and should tell the partner. But this person has to choose the right moment and use words that won’t hurt or even anger the partner too much. The biggest mistake men and women do when this is concerned is discussing the problem the minute they see it, like directly after a not very successful sexual encounter. Let’s use concrete examples, so you can get a better picture of what we’re trying to explain. For example, a man comes too soon and the woman attacks him and accuses him of being a lousy lover, an egotist and tells him to get out of her bed. Instead of focusing, trying to understand him and trying to solve the problem diplomatically, she is hurt and angry and lashes out, but nothing good can come of this. The same goes for men, who are bothered by the fact that their girl forgets about oral intercourse, for example. Instead of asking her cunning questions, they attack her and reproach her for forgetting about them and sometimes even threaten to look for oral intercourse elsewhere. This is of course not good and will have exactly the opposite effect with the woman, which means that you still won’t be getting any oral intercourse.

 


Don’t reproach your partner’s possible mistakes while you’re angry and don’t be rude about it. (JLP)

Don’t compare him to your ex!

If you were used too different and livelier sexual activity with your ex partner and are missing it now, don’t tell this to your current boyfriend or girlfriend too directly. This would be a huge mistake that would cause a lot of resentment and even greater problems in your sex life. You can bring your previous habits to your new relationship in a more cunning way, as a part of your wishes where you can’t show that you did this before, especially if your partner’s a bit more reserved and isn’t used to the things you did with your ex. If a man was used to anal intercourse with his ex, for example, and is not getting it now, he cannot hold this against her and tell her that his ex was better and let him do this. This would destroy her and nothing good would be accomplished. You must go at it like a diplomat, say these things are your desires and longings. You just have to say that this really feels good to you and turns you on. The same will happen if the woman was used to the man licking her anus in the previous relationship and the new partner doesn’t want to do it. God forbid that she should mention the ex and explain that if he could have done it, so can he. Talking about ex partners can be very sensitive, so don’t use these methods to make your sexual desires come true.

 


If you were used to a different kind of sexuality with your previous partner, don’t be too direct when telling your new partner about it. (JLP)

Can you lie that the intercourse was good?

An even more sensitive situation is when the intercourse wasn’t good and the partner thinks you will compliment him and that he was really good. Don’t worry, this can also be solved in an elegant way. If a woman didn’t reach an orgasm, a man must be clear about not doing a good job, which means that he’ll probably not be expecting any great compliments. What if she had an orgasm, but the intercourse still wasn’t all she expected it to be? Or even better, what if the man’s “mistakes” keep repeating and gathering for so long that you have to address the issue eventually and talk about the problems honestly?  If she can’t say this in a nice way, she will insult his male pride and won’t accomplish anything. It’s better to choose your words. This goes for talking about sexual intercourse as well. You have to find the right moment, a moment that has nothing to do with sexual intercourse, a moment that has no worries of disappointment and a moment when you’re both in a good mood. At that time, the conversation can be very honest, maybe even fun. A similar example can be found with oral intercourse, where a man might not have been completely satisfied. If he attacks the woman right after the act and accuses her of not performing well and that she could’ve done things differently, this will not be good. You have to choose a different moment for this discussion as well. A moment when no one is burdened and nervous about having this kind of conversation. In short, talk about sexual intercourse when you’re not about to have it and when you’re not concerned about it.