Mistakes of Stimulating the Clitoris

Many men believe that it doesn’t matter how and when they attack the clitoris. A mistake.

Don’t be hesitant to follow her advice!

For a start, let me say that there’s no general rule on how to give great oral pleasure to your partner because a man can only learn this from his woman. So, let go of the thought that if your partner is giving you advice or directing you during oral intercourse, that she’s attacking your ego. Take it as an indicator of the right way to go. This is the only way to improve and make her even more satisfied the next time. Let her guide you and if she’s not guiding you, ask and learn. Don’t jump to any conclusions on your own. But you should definitely not think that if you found the clitoris, this will make you the best lover of all times. That’s certainly not the case.

Don’t attack the clitoris intensively until she’s turned on!

As we have already said – there is no general rule about what you should do to give her really good oral pleasure, so we will only whisper in your ear about what not to do. Don’t attack the clitoris until the woman is turned on. I know it sounds like a paradox. The clitoris is what usually makes her come, but now you shouldn’t stimulate it until she is turned on?! Yes, it sounds like a paradox, but let me explain. You can stimulate it before she is turned on, but you have to do it in the right way. How?

How to stimulate the clitoris then?

Many men get to work with their tongue on her clitoris with the intention of arousing her. Unfortunately, the effect will be just the opposite. Your tongue will become dry, as will her vagina because most women don’t like to have their clitoris poked with the tongue before they’re turned on. What’s more, not only are they not turned on, but it actually cools her off. How to handle it? Authoress of the book How to Give Her Absolute Pleasure, Lou Paget, advises that you stick to her with full, warm lips, zig and zag a bit (if you have to), then keep on stimulating with your full lips. The clitoris enjoys being gently sucked with full lips. It also enjoys the pressure and does not enjoy the isolated pressure with the tongue very much. Actually, it might be best if you stimulate her most erogenous organ first – her skin. Kiss, caress, lick, then make a big circle towards the clitoris, but don’t touch it until she is literally begging you. At that moment, you can let go. Anyway, you will gain the most knowledge if you test these things in practice and watch your partner to see what turns her on. Maybe she wants to tell you, but is afraid she might make you feel like a bad lover if she corrects your actions.

Find more tips for oral stimulation in the Encyclopedia of Sexuality!