Who to Choose for a Threesome?

7.04.2010 | By: I. M.

Do you want to get a third person into your bed? Such an act requires a great deal of carefulness, pre-planning and thought. Read more in the article.

Before you decide to indulge in a wild erotic experience, make sure your feelings can handle it. (PhotoXpress)

Deal with your feelings first

Only a couple with partners who are very aware of their feelings about a ménage a trois can do a so-called threesome. First, you have to ask yourself how it feel to be watching someone else touching your partner’s body. You have to ask yourself if this sexual experience will make you feel jealousy, sadness or anger. The most important question is whether this adventure can jeopardize your relationship. If the answers to these questions are more negative than positive, you should definitely not do this. Do think clearly if you really want a third person to come between you.

Set the rules of the game clearly

Before taking this wild ride with your partner, you have to set the rules that have to be obeyed the whole time. If you only want your partners to watch you with another person and masturbate, you have to tell them that clearly. If they join the action against your will, they may jeopardize your entire relationship. If you want them to only have intercourse with you and not touch the other person, if you basically let them know the other person is only at your disposal, they should definitely consider and understand your wishes. If you allow your partners to have relations with this third person, you have to face all those questions we mentioned before because, otherwise, any contact and any body movement will hurt you emotionally and when the adventure is over, the reproaches will rain down.

A close friend

Women often pick a close female friend for a ménage a trois. They know this person and trust her. The danger of this choice is when the romantic relationship becomes endangered. A betrayal of friendship can also occur if your friend has a go at your partner without your permission. If you’re thinking of involving your friends into your intercourse, think about whether this might jeopardize your friendship. A lot of friendships turn into hatred thanks to that one night.

Be very clear when you tell your partner if you want them to only watch you doing it with another person or if you want them to be involved in the intercourse. (PhotoXpress)

A perfect stranger

If you find the image of your friend in a threesome uncomfortable, you may find it easier to imagine a perfect stranger in this erotic experience. You can meet such people via advertisements, the internet or with the help of a dating agency. Create a nickname on the internet with your partner which will show your intent, like ‘horny_couple’ or ‘partyOfthree’ or ‘WantAThreesome’. In this way, everyone will know what you’re about and it will be easier for people to talk to you. The only downside to meeting strangers is that you can’t be sure that this person will be physically attractive to you. So, if these people have no picture, arrange to meet for some coffee before the adventure. The conversation can then go in the right direction, or you say goodbye to these people in a kind way. Another downside to inviting strangers into your bed is not knowing their sexual history, so use a condom in any case. The advantage is that there’s no emotional attachment.

A single or attached person: threesome or swinging?

Single people definitely have an advantage with invitations, unless they’re in a very open partnership. Some prefer good old (and very discrete) swinging to a threesome because it’s much more simple and ‘honest’. It’s about simply switching partners between couples who are sexually curious and want to spice up intercourse with the presence of other people. There are many clubs around the world which throw swingers’ parties. The advantage of these clubs is that you can choose a couple that suits you most when it comes to conversation skills and physical attributes right at that moment. So, there are many ways to bring other people into your bedroom. But don’t forget ... your feelings come first.