6 Biggest Sex Mistakes Men Make

26.10.2009 | By: JP

Gentlemen - do you believe you know all there is to know about women and sex? Think again.

We learned sex by the ear so sex mistakes are inevitable. (jlp)

The encyclopedia of sex we carry around in our heads is full of assumptions and false beliefs about women’s sexuality. Sex mistakes happen because we learn as we go, without proper instruction, and experience can’t teach us anything if there isn’t proper communication to point our mistakes to us. Forget porn movies, a far cry from real life – instead read the following advice and think about what you’re doing right and what’s downright wrong!

Sex mistake no.1: I know what she wants

Men often assume what a woman likes on the basis of their past experiences with other women. But one women’s fantasy is another’s’ nightmare. The range of sex skills we’ve learned during our sexual awakening needs to be constantly updated, changed and adapted, as we can never be sure that something which worked well with our last partner will please other women too. Of course this doesn’t go just for sex, but for all other aspects of a relationship as well.

Sex mistake no.2: I’ve got everything she needs

Most women can’t reach an orgasm without direct stimulation of their clitoris, so even the longest penis in the world won’t do you any good. Some of them need vibrations at more than 3000 revolutions per minute, something no tongue or finger is capable of. So don’t be offended if she needs the help of a vibrator to climax. There’s nothing wrong with her, or you! The vibrator is your accomplice, not your surrogate. Lots of couples use sex toys – while the vibrator does its job you can focus on pleasuring her in an exciting new way.

Sex mistake no 3: If I’m enjoying myself she must be, too.

Wrong! The correct statement reads: “If she’s enjoying it, I’m enjoying too.” The greatest pleasure in sex comes from giving pleasure to your partner. You can never be sure that something which feels very good to you is equally pleasant for her. The psychological and physiological differences between men and women are jus too great for them to have the same experience of sex. In penetration, men experience very strong sensations, so they can’t understand that a woman isn’t enjoying it, and that she might even be in pain. Be very careful that she is moist enough and that you don’t penetrate too deeply.

Don’t try to guess what she likes – ask her! (jlp)

Sex error no.4: I know a woman’s body

Reading an article about female erogenous zones doesn’t make you an expert on the subject! Most men know what the clitoris is and how to find it, but that doesn’t mean they understand its importance and functioning. The belief that female orgasm can be achieved only with vaginal stimulation is still alive and kicking although this isn’t true for most women. Men also don’t realize how sensitive the clitoris really is and fail to touch it in the right way. A touch which is orgasmic for one woman, might not even be felt by someone else, while it might be even painful for some women. How can you find out how she feels? Simple – ask her!

Sex mistake no. 5: wet =aroused

Wrong again. Men are sometimes disappointed when a women’s vagina is rather dry as they think it comes from lack of sexual excitement. No need to worry, as the degree of moisture in the vagina is not always directly connected to sexual arousal. Some women get wet faster than others, while the amount of lubrication changes on a daily basis. It depends on her menstrual cycle but it’s also influenced by other things such as stress or certain medication.

Sex mistake no.6: silence is golden

A lot of men believe they should keep quiet during sex. Wrong. If you don’t speak up, she’ll have to guess your likes and dislikes. A woman who wants to please you will value every hint and put it to good use. Of course you mustn’t grab her by the hair and shove your penis into her face – there are better, much subtler ways of letting her know what you want – verbal communication being one of them.