How to Deal with Vaginismus?
Involuntary muscle contractions triggered around the vaginal opening are very unpleasant and prevent a woman from having a normal sex life. What can you do when you are faced with vaginismus?
A spasm in the lower part of the vagina can have different causes that are usually of a psychological nature. (Photoxpress)
Fear of sexual intercourse
Vaginismus, or a muscle spasm around the vaginal opening, is triggered by an attempt to have intercourse and prevents the penis from penetrating the vagina. It literally closes the vagina and tightens the muscles. In most cases, it has psychological causes resulting from different kinds of fear related to sex. This can be the fear of sexual intercourse which is caused by an unpleasant experience in one's youth. Maybe it’s the fear of sexual harassment in the family, rape or a violent and egotistic partner.
Fear of loss of virginity
A muscle spasm is also often experienced by a virgin who is about to lose her virginity and is terribly afraid of the first penetration of the penis into her vagina. The girl believes that she’ll die from pain. Maybe the problem is also in the fact that she’s too young, that is, maybe she wants to lose her virginity before being completely ready for it.
A vaginal spasm can tighten the muscles so much that penetration is practically impossible. (Photoxpress)
Fear of pregnancy and feeling guilty
Many girls are afraid that they’ll get pregnant, which can also trigger vaginismus - a muscle spasm felt in the lower third of the vagina. Even if the partner uses a condom, it’s the same thing because vaginismus involves paranoid fear that disrupts normal sex life. Such a woman doesn’t feel any better even if she takes contraceptive pills because her problems are in her mind and she isn’t aware that this fear is completely unnecessary. The same goes for women who feel guilty. Maybe this is because they’re cheating on their partners, or they feel as if they committed a sin by having sex.
Masturbation as a solution
In most cases, a consultation is needed with a doctor or another professional who explains to a woman the importance of the vagina for sexual intercourse and convinces her that her fear is unfounded. Vaginismus is therefore very similar to impotence, particularly 
the impotence that has psychological causes. In that case, a consultation is also needed, but above all, the woman needs the understanding of her partner.
A woman suffering from vaginal spasms can also help herself. Maybe it’s best if she experiments during masturbation. When she feels a spasm, she can hold tight her finger or vibrator and then look at her body in a mirror. She should place herself in front of a mirror so as to see exactly what is going on in her vagina. She can use a lubricant and really soak her vagina, which means that she might penetrate it with her little finger despite a spasm. A woman with such problems should avoid penetration for a while and get to know her body, thus trying to find a solution to this problem without involving the help of a doctor.
A normal vagina widens before penetration, while a vagina suffering from spasms shrinks and prevents sexual intercourse. (Photoxpress)
Penetration with the little finger should be slow
You have to be patient when treating vaginismus, which means that you have to take time during masturbation. As already said, it’s best to use the little finger or a very thin object and penetrate your vagina very slowly. If it’s impossible, don’t push it, but you shouldn’t give up. Try again and again and constantly keep your vagina moist with a lubricant or saliva. If you reach an orgasm, don’t burden yourself and continue as long as the spasm doesn’t ease a little and the entrance to the vagina widens. Next time try to penetrate your vagina with a larger object or a wider finger and in that way you’ll get used to penetration and be able to experience every possible thrill with your partner - in time!
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